Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Welcome to the Slaughterhouse: Smoker's Rights?!?!

"If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter." George Washington

Welcome to the Slaughterhouse, America!!

By Nicholas Meyeres

Just the other day, I saw a sight that I thought I would never see again in today’s world. I watched a woman stumble out of a small, compact and crowded car as a wave of cigarette smoke billowed out after her— chasing her like a rabid dingo scavenging for raw meat. But that wasn’t the part that shocked me. It was when she rounded the back of the car to open the passenger’s side door.

She reached in (with cigarette dangling from her mouth like a limp piece of pickled asparagus) and grabbed an infant girl in her arms. The smoke not only wafted into the innocent child’s face and nose and lungs without restraint, but the red hot poker at the tip of the woman’s lips came within a mere fraction of an inch of the baby’s brand new skin.

Barring for just one second how completely inappropriate and inconsiderate second hand smoke is to all of us non-smokers, and just how deadly it can almost always be; it is frankly appalling to me in this day and age (the age of mass and very public information) that smokers even still exist!... Let alone subject their children to their addictive, noxious, and basically venomous behavior.

After all, it is common knowledge that between 70% and 90% of non-smokers in the American population- children as well as adults- are regularly exposed to secondhand smoke. It is estimated that only 15% of cigarette smoke actually gets inhaled by the smoker. The remaining 85% lingers in the air for EVERYONE to breathe. If a person spends more than two hours in a room where someone is smoking, the nonsmoker inhales the equivalent of four entire cigarettes.

Secondhand smoke is the third leading preventable cause of disability and early death (after active smoking and alcohol) in the United States. For every eight smokers who die from smoking, one innocent bystander dies from secondhand smoke. Couldn’t that be construed as grounds for manslaughter in the judicial system today? Why are smokers allowed to kill our children, and get away with it?

Unfortunately, this is all particularly disturbing since less than 20% of the entire population of the United States smokes. Yet, smokers get nearly all the protection under the law, excluding some restaurants and public facilities that have finally gotten smart and banned it from their premises entirely.

"But don’t smokers have rights?" "If we give the government the power to regulate smoking, what comes next?" "Will all of our rights as Americans be completely eroded if the smoker’s drug of choice is made illegal?" Smokers say these and many other things, and are as obnoxious as ever- especially now that we have a President that admits to smoking today. It's like they have carte blanche to engage in this behavior because our Barry does.

For the love of Pete, this is idiocy!

As the old comic book adage goes, “With great power, comes great responsibility.” But I say, “With true freedom, comes personal responsibility.” You must show restraint and consideration for those people around you especially when you engage in deadly and unwanted behaviors that effect the greater good of the majority of the people.

Therefore, we have to consistently rise to the occasion and be the best and most honorable individuals we can be as an entire people, especially for the sake and well-being of our children. They are what’s most important. They are who we must protect. After all, let’s call it for what it truly is: smoking is abuse.

Second hand smoke has been proven to be more harmful than regular smoking, after all. This is something that has been on the radio, tv and in the newspapers for years, yet people continue to smoke around their children and subject them to this "abuse".

Is this any less harmful than the lead that we find in toy products or on our walls or in our schools that we are told will kill us?

Every time a person breathes in second-hand smoke, over 100 harmful chemical agents - carcinogens and toxins are consumed. And in case you don't already know- some of these carcinogens include benzene, 1,3-butadiene, benzoapyrene, 4-(methylnitrosamino)-1-(3-pyridyl)-1-butanone and many others. The bottom line is, things like asbestos are not allowed to be used in homes today, but smoking is still perfectly legal.

Some things I will sadly NEVER understand! But in the meantime, the next time a smoker lights up in front of you or your kids; take a swig from the Big Gulp you bought from 7-Eleven that morning, swish it around nice and slobbery in your mouth (especially if you have recently eaten and still have food between your teeth); then, rear back, hock it right in his face, and say, "Gosh! I hope you don't mind my second hand spit!" That'll teach 'em! ... Or it will get you into a nice, big fist fight. Either way, now you've got their attention.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Welcome to the Slaughterhouse: Christianity: The best damn protection racket around!

"If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter." George Washington

Welcome to the Slaughterhouse, America!!
By Nicholas Meyeres

Christianity is the belief that a cosmic Zombie Jewish carpenter who was somehow conceived without a father, but who is in some way his own celestial father born of flesh and blood to a VIRGIN; who can also make you live forever only if you symbolically eat his skin and telepathically tell him every night before bedtime that you accept his claim as lord and master over everything in creation; so he can mystically remove the invisible evil force living inside of you like an undetectable tumor all because a woman wearing a fig leaf was convinced by a talking snake to eat a magical fruit from a forbidden tree in a lush, tropical, beautiful garden somewhere in the Middle Eastern DESERT…. Do I have that straight?

Makes sense to me too!

Seriously though, Christianity is a belief system that denies all sorts of other beliefs to everyone else here on Earth, but when someone denies ours to us we are outraged, and further, we feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists anthropomorphize other life forms such as great apes as some distant cousin perhaps more intelligent than your average hillbilly uncle from the deep south, but they still have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt, a rib, and a breath of life from an invisible man sitting somewhere in the sky spying on you when you shower. This is the "God" that gives you famine, plague, murder, rape, and United States Congressmen— not a toy train set and a dolly that wets herself on command for Christmas. No. Just all the other really, REALLY bad shit!

Which bring me to a relatively recent census report: According to the Federal Bureau of Prisons, it was concluded that Christians make up 75% of the entire U.S. population. And that they also make up 75% of the prison population. While conversely, atheists and agnostics make up almost 20% of the total U.S. population, but only .029% of the total prison population.

Isn’t that just a little interesting? When we grow up being taught that a kind, tolerant, all-seeing, all-knowing, benevolent god that cares for us murders the entire population of the Earth just to "start all over" because he isn’t pleased with the outcome; it makes me wonder if our "nature" to be sinful is really all that ironic given how we were "raised" by a God with more anger management issues than a drunk at Christmas-time. God needs a 12 step program, that’s for damn certain!!! Seriously, isn't this the ultimate Nature vs. Nurture senerio? It's our "nature" to be sinful according to religious folks, but damn it!- God sure does suck in the nurture department, am I right!?!

I mean, to believe a loving Lord who would just as soon banish you to an eternity of Hell rather than allow you to think for yourself makes you wonder how honorable this dude is to start with.

Of course, then there’s the old adage that “God told me to”, which actually works out for some people. Or rather, the ones who say, “I wanted to be just like God—that’s why I killed all those people with a high-powered assault rifle from a cockroach-infested hotel room three stories up.”

But, good news! All we have to do is say to the offender, “accept God into your heart and you are saved”, or that it was all “God’s will” and thankfully we’re all off the hook from actually using our brains and figuring it out ourselves.

God is good, indeed. REAL good. And sneaky as shit!

But hey, I can’t prove the God-nonsense anymore than the average Christian can prove his claim that God IS real, so I guess it’s all a moot point in the day’s end when it’s all done anyway. After all, whether you buy a ticket for the magical Mormon underpants tour, believe in talking bushes that espouse the word of God through musical theatre, think there are entire worlds chock full of virgins waiting for you when you die, or know that Tom Cruise really IS from another planet— there are only two different people in the world. The sane, and the bat-shit crazy!

But are the religious THAT crazy? Religion seems to be a pretty smart racket, to be sure!

Several forms of rackets exist. The best-known is the protection racket, in which criminals demand money from businesses in exchange for the service of "protection" against crimes that the racketeers themselves instigate if unpaid.

Let that sink in for a minute or two.

Alright, done? Religion is the single most brilliant protection racket around!

Let’s break that definition down by the numbers, shall we?

Several forms of rackets (religions) exist. The best-known is the protection racket (Christianity), in which criminals (ministers, priests, reverends, etc.) demand money (tithing) from businesses (sinners) in exchange for the service of "protection" (the right to go to Heaven) against crimes (sins) that the racketeers (the church) themselves instigate if unpaid (you go to Hell).

"Traditionally, the word racket is used to describe a business that is based on the example of the 'protection racket' and indicates that the speaker believes that the business is making money by selling a solution to a problem that it created (or that it intentionally allows to continue to exist), specifically so that continuous purchases of the solution are always needed."

You can’t get any clearer than that!

So, when you lie awake in your bed at night wondering if you will go to Heaven or Hell when you die, remember this: Life ain’t so bad on this rock while you’re here, if you let it be. Sure, bad stuff happens to good people and hot pink Capri pants are still being sold in stores; but the sun still shines, birds still sing, healthy babies are born every day, and Ben and Jerry’s comes in 62 flavors and counting! And, if by some stretch of the imagination I am right and this is all you got, you will have wasted it all for the chance at something better that was never really there in the first place. Besides, life is short and you gotta’ lot of ice cream to try!

After all, Thomas Jefferson said, "Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear." And who am I to argue with one of our greatest Founding Fathers?